Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize