piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
its not stalking. its research.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize
