This girl is more easily done than said...
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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