everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize