She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
