these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
