i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
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