That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
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