Are we in a gay sports bar?
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
you didnt know i had herpes?
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Randomize
