I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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