Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize