is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
I touched a dick in church today
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
