i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Randomize
