: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
