Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
