Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
Randomize
