no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
