so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize