i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
