So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize
