I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I just had sex on a roof
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
