did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
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