OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
