how can u be prego again
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
