Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
There's even glitter on my cock...
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