where does the pee come out of this thing
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize
