I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
