Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
