What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
