so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
