I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
