I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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