Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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