Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
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