I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
