Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Randomize
