I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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