walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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