Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
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