just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize
