Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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