worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Randomize
