I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize