it wasn't lemon gatorade
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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