i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Randomize
