"it" just moved
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
