Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
this just has baby written all over it
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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