i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Randomize
