its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
my being single is dangerous.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
