Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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